Valentine, on-call
Alphonce Omondi

He talks to other women

We quarrel every day because bae likes chatting to other women. I don’t like it. I get jealous; he says I don’t trust him but it’s only that I don’t want to lose him.

Cheating on social media

Hmmm, the joys of dating in 2016! We used to get annoyed and jealous when our partners looked at other women in front of us. Now they don’t even have to leave the house or raise their heads. They do not even have to walk up to a woman and risk face-to-face rejection. We don’t have to pick out a date outfit and spend money on dates. All this is cut short by social media and I get that you feel cheated on.

Of course you don’t like it

Here you are in what you think is a committed and monogamous relationship and yet, your partner appears to be single and available to a whole bunch of women. Of course, this makes you jealous and angry. Of course you do not like it. He might not be going on physical dates but he is dating other women virtually. After all, what do we do on dates? We chat. We get to know each other. We share ideas and who we are.

While he is available to these women, he is not fully committed to you and your relationship.

Have your say

You are going to have to put your foot down on this one. To me, and I think to you, this is non-negotiable. It is a deal breaker – either he stops, or you stop seeing him exclusively. Because trust me, he is not seeing you exclusively. He might act like it is all innocent fun, but I think if you too started ‘chatting’ with men for hours on end, he would change his tune.

I hate to deliver bad news but your boyfriend is still single and mingling, and it is time to decide if that is what you want. The point of dating is to find someone we like, who likes us and wants a similar relationship to what we want. It sounds to me like you want different things.
 

Do you think it’s okay to chat with others of the opposite sex as long as nothing happens? Tell us on Love Matters Kenya or Naija.

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Recent Comments (14)

  1. To me it’s ok but there must
    To me it’s ok but there must be a limit

    1. Thank you Mary for your input
      Thank you Mary for your input.

  2. Nothing bad so long as there
    Nothing bad so long as there is trust in the relationship!

    1. Thanks Tiplit for sharing our
      Thanks Tiplit for sharing our thoughts with us.

  3. It is not good 2 chat on 2
    It is not good 2 chat on 2 someone.

    1. Hi Okello, thanks for that
      Hi Okello, thanks for that input.

  4. As long as one is faithful,
    As long as one is faithful, its ok to chat but with respect also to your partner, don’t give much attention to a point you make your partner get bored

    1. Thank you Kiprot for taking
      Thank you Kiprot for taking time to share your thoughts with us.

  5. it depends on wat he is
    it depends on wat he is chatting abt wit da other sex,if he is flatting n writing sweet nothings 2 them then its not OK,talk 2 him n if he won’t change then his social media ”friends” mean a lot 2 him mo than u do

    1. Thank you Angela for sharing
      Thank you Angela for sharing your thoughts with us.

    1. What do you mean Elizabeth?…

      What do you mean Elizabeth? Do you agree or not? 

  6. Yeah as long as nothing…
    Yeah as long as nothing happens between them

    1. Mmmhh…Thank you for your…

      Mmmhh…Thank you for your response. Keep reading our articles. 

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