Making love during pregnancy.
Jeff Thrower

Sex during pregnancy: top five facts

Couples are scared that sex during pregnancy will harm their baby. But most fears and worries about sex during pregnancy are unnecessary. Here are the facts…

  1. Not only is it safe, it’s good for you

    Sex is generally safe during all stages of a normal pregnancy, but you should always check with your doctor to make sure there will be no problems. If you have a history of miscarriages, for example, your doctor may ask you to avoid intercourse during the first trimester. But as long as you are having an uncomplicated pregnancy, you can go on enjoying sex right up until your due date.

    And don’t be unnecessarily worried about your baby: he or she is well-protected within the womb. They will not be harmed by penetrative sex. Although some positions may cause discomfort, as long as you are relaxed, without putting too much pressure on the tummy (especially as you approach your due date), everything should be fine.

    In fact, sex during pregnancy is good for you and your baby. It’s a pleasurable, full body workout that releases endorphins into the bloodstream, helping you to feel more relaxed and happy – feelings that are passed on to the little one growing within.

    Furthermore, if your baby is coming soon, sex may help your body prepare for labour, as orgasm can cause the uterus to contract (good practice for birth) and a man’s semen contains a hormone called prostaglandin, which may help start contractions and soften the cervix.

  2. It’s all about position

    As your pregnancy progresses and your body undergoes changes, some of your favourite sexual positions will no longer be comfortable or even possible. Some sex positions that put too much weight on the abdomen can make things painful for the mother.

    Be creative and start experimenting. Try out new positions and bring in pillows for support where needed. Any position that puts the woman on the bottom is likely to be uncomfortable. Try having sex side-by-side, with the woman on top, or in a spooning position with the man entering from behind.

    Positions will also need to change as the pregnancy progresses and the body changes. In addition to position, you may also need to use a water-based lubricant – it can sometimes be harder to get wet during pregnancy.

  3. The rollercoaster of desire 

    During pregnancy, it is normal for both the mother and the father to experience a change in their level of sexual desire. Some will find themselves roaring with passion, others won’t. Some women may not want to have sex – believing it will harm the baby or induce labour (even when they know it won’t!) – while for others, the changing hormones will make sex irresistible. Sometimes, particularly during the first trimester, many women find themselves too tired and nauseated and uncomfortable to have sex. Meanwhile, during the second trimester, many women experience a surge of hormones (including testosterone) that can significantly boost sex drive. Later in the pregnancy, more blood flow to the pelvic region, the freedom of not having to worry about birth control and increased sensitivity of the skin, especially around the breasts and other erogenous zones, may also increase sexual desire.

    Meanwhile, it’s perfectly normal for the mother’s partner to be extra aroused by all the changes occurring in her body, particularly her growing breasts!

  4. Communication is key

    The key to great lovemaking and intimacy during pregnancy is communication. Be open and honest with your feelings, especially if you have mixed thoughts about having sex. At the same time, encourage your partner to talk about their worries and desires, especially if there has been a noticeable change in their sexual behaviour.

    During sex, be sure to check in frequently to make sure your partner is enjoying the experience. You could ask: Is this position still comfortable? What can I do to make you more comfortable? Are you concerned about the baby? Should we try something different?

    Even if your doctor has asked you to avoid sex, there are other ways to continue an intimate and loving relationship. Oral sex is always an alternative to penetration during pregnancy – just be careful not to blow air into the vagina. It can cause an air bubble in your blood stream, which is a very serious problem for you and your baby. You can also continue expressing your love and affection by taking romantic walks, enjoying romantic dinners, giving each other massages or watching a movie together.

  5. When to practice abstinence

    For some couples, particularly those with a history of miscarriage, doctors may advise to abstain during the first trimester. During this time, the foetus is going through big changes. So too much bumping around could harm the pregnancy.

    Likewise, your doctor may also advise abstinence during the last four weeks of pregnancy, as the risk of infection from unprotected or oral sex could force you to have a c-section to avoid infecting your baby. Sex during this time could also increase the risk of early labour.

    Sex will also be restricted if you have problems with your placenta. Abstinence is also essential if your cervix dilates prematurely, as this puts your baby at risk of infection.

    Basically sex during pregnancy is generally okay, but first, you need to consult your doctor. If your doctor asks you to abstain during any period of your pregnancy, be sure to find out what that actually means – no penetration, no orgasms, or no sexual arousal whatsoever. Different conditions require different restrictions and this knowledge will really help you to have a safe pregnancy and enjoy a healthy relationship.

    Through with your pregnancy and wondering when you can start having sex again? Here are some tips on sex after pregnancy.

     

    We’d love to hear from you. If you have any comments or questions, leave a comment below or start a discussion on Facebook

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Recent Comments (84)

  1. Thenx for the information, I
    Thenx for the information, I had known no idea, especially the third point

  2. so after which period of time
    so after which period of time am i supporsed to have sex during pregnancy n after? Next quiz is it right to use condom when my wife is pregnant?

    1. Peter,

      Peter,
      as the article says, it’s call about communication. No woman is the same, so it’s impossible to say ‘you shouldn’t have sex in the last trimester’. If she feels up to it, great. If not, then it’s a ‘no’.
      After pregnancy is a different story. You need to wait at least 6 weeks before having sex, maybe even longer depending on how she feels. https://lovematters.co.ke/news/sex-after-pregnancy-top-five-facts
      Nothing speaks against using a condom during pregnancy, and it could prevent infections such as UTIs.

  3. i have learnt what i always
    i have learnt what i always wondering about, thanks for your teachings.

  4. If i can get pregnant, i wont
    If i can get pregnant, i wont have sex, coz i will be too much excited

  5. Will it have nehative effects
    Will it have nehative effects to guy who is not responsible for the pregnancy?

    1. You mean, if you have sex
      You mean, if you have sex with a woman who is pregnant from another man, will it have negative effects? Physically, no, emotionally, maybe.

  6. Will it have nehative effects
    Will it have nehative effects to guy who is not responsible for the pregnancy?

  7. wow,, i like it…its really
    wow,, i like it…its really educative

  8. it’s to share tha ideas after
    it’s to share tha ideas after how long should a lady/woman have sex after giving birth?

  9. Very important information
    Very important information much appreciated

  10. I love the teaching about
    I love the teaching about pregnancy

  11. fantastic n informal
    fantastic n informal teachings.

  12. does sex after birth have
    does sex after birth have negative impact on the breastfed baby?

  13. i dank u 4 ur teachingx dix
    i dank u 4 ur teachingx dix issue have been dixturbing me.i appreciate it.

    1. You are very welcome!
      You are very welcome!

  14. danx 4r de teachingx dix
    danx 4r de teachingx dix issuex hve been dixturbing me.

  15. it did help me a lot. I have
    it did help me a lot. I have experience. and this is very true.

  16. My husband refuse to have sex
    My husband refuse to have sex with me because am pregnant and he does it after one weak and i experience some pain when he is entering.my pregnancy is 34wks old i try to talk to him but it does not work

    1. Jane,

      Jane,
      what are you trying to talk to him about?

  17. how long will it take for one
    how long will it take for one to be pregnant after stoping using family planning injection

    1. Shika,

      Shika,
      it can take a few months for the body to get back to a normal hormonal balance, and then, most women get pregnant within a year. Make sure you time sex well around the time of ovulation.

  18. Waw I have been upset with
    Waw I have been upset with this kind of teaching I am always sexually attractive but have good remedy for wife thanks for advance please put more on the same topic
    thanks

    1. Great, good to know you
      Great, good to know you learned and enjoyed. Thank you.

  19. yes it helps uterus 2
    yes it helps uterus 2 contract quickly bt it depends on ur partners behaviour towards u

    1. Thanks for your input
      Thanks for your input shafarah.

  20. Mam meri wife last period
    Mam meri wife last period date 23 July ko tha uske bad usko period nhi hua aur hamare bich unsafe sex 4 September ko hua.to me ye janana chahta hu ki kya wo pahle she pregnant thi

    1. (No subject)
      Hi Jonu,

      Please send your question in English so we can support you.

  21. This is very educational!
    This is very educational!

  22. Most stories I have heard…
    Most stories I have heard are of women who either had sex until the end of their pregnancy or lost the desire at a very early stage.

    1. Thank you for the feedback…
      Thank you for the feedback Mary.

  23. Thank you for your…
    Thank you for your contribution Innocent.

  24. Good one …keep up love…
    Good one …keep up love matters. I love your article s…

    1. Hi, we are glad. You are…

      Hi, we are glad. You are welcome.

  25. am 4
    months the problem wen…

    am 4
    months the problem wen i have sex wit my husband i feel some pain at the lower part of my tummy wat might be the problem

    1. Hey Joyce, it is safe to…

      Hey Joyce, it is safe to have sex during your pregnancy period. Pain that come in the form of cramps is one of the side effects that come with being pregnant. This should get better as you get along. Check out the following article to see what else you should expect during your pregnancy;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/pregnancy/being-pregnant/your-body-and-pregnancy https://lovemattersafrica.com/pregnancy/sex-during-pregnancy-top-five-facts We wish you all the best in your pregnancy journey.

  26. Am new in this site actually…
    Am new in this site actually have learned so many things . thanks a lot

    1. You are welcome Okoth, we…

      You are welcome Okoth, we are glad.

  27. Thanks alot for your…
    Thanks alot for your teachings am really brain feeded

    1. We appreciate the feedback…

      We appreciate the feedback Juliet.

  28. My periods mostly comes on…
    My periods mostly comes on 18th…bh after meeting en have sex….I took p2 ….en my periods comes mostly on 27 coz of p2….am I long

  29. What are the side effects of…
    What are the side effects of musterbation please

  30. Hi mam, I am five months…
    Hi mam, I am five months pregnant my breast and stomach is itching me also, the breast has started some marks. Please can you be of help. Thank you

    1. Hi Hadiza, you may have…

      Hi Hadiza, you may have noticed that your breast have become bigger and so has your tummy. This has led to the skin in these areas to stretch which also means the skin maybe dryer hence the itchiness and possible irritation. It may help to use a lotion and w ear loose, breathable cotton clothes to reduce the irritation. Additionally, have a look at the following article for more information on what to expect during pregnancy;- https://lovemattersafrica.com/pregnancy/being-pregnant/your-body-and-pregnancy

  31. Thanks for the advice I am…
    Thanks for the advice I am three weeks pregnant but I feel the urge to have sex with my husband and he feels same but we are just afraid of harming our baby
    how can we manage that

  32. Thanks a lot I found the…
    Thanks a lot I found the site helpfull

  33. Hello Anonymous, thank you…

    Hello Anonymous, thank you so much for your positive feedback! We strive to provide helpful information to our wonderful subscribers and followers! Have a wonderful weekend and stay safe!

  34. Thanks for your effort
    Thanks for your effort

  35. Hello Musbahu dayyabu, thank…

    Hello Musbahu dayyabu, thank you so much for your positive feedback! Stay safe and have a wonderful week ahead 🙂 

  36. isn’t adversable dat when…
    isn’t adversable dat when you are pregnant you enjoy sex dairly

  37. Hello Megan, thank you for…

    Hello Megan, thank you for getting in touch with us and asking a great question. Click here to find out more about having sex while pregnant: lovemattersafrica.com/pregnancy/pregnant-sex-is-good-if-you-dont-know

    Let us know if the information helps and have a great week ahead! Stay safe!

  38. Can a woman concieve onother…
    Can a woman concieve onother baby inside her womb wile pregnant

  39. Hi Antony, thank you for…

    Hi Antony, thank you for getting in touch and asking a great question. In extremely rare cases, a woman can get pregnant while already pregnant. Normally, a pregnant woman’s ovaries temporarily stop releasing eggs. But in a rare phenomenon called superfetation, another egg is released, gets fertilized with sperm, and attaches to the wall of the uterus, resulting in two babies.

  40. So what should I use when I…
    So what should I use when I have an

    headache

    1. Hello Sabinah, thank you for…

      Hello Sabinah, thank you for reaching out to us we appreciate it. Headaches are a common side effect of pregnancy. However, it could be an indicator of something else and so you may need to see a medical practitioner to diagnose you and give you advice on the best way forward.

  41. Is it normal when having sex…
    Is it normal when having sex u fill pain in the abdomen

    1. Hello Anonymous, painful sex…

      Hello Anonymous, painful sex during sex is rather common but ideally should not be present. It could be caused by any number of medical issues. We strongly advise that you visit a medical practitioner at your earliest convenience for a proper diagnosis and advice on the way forward.

  42. am 21 circles and its hard…
    am 21 circles and its hard even to calculate ovulation days coz my days are irregular,even planning to get pregnant is hard.how can i do??

    1. Hi Joyner, 

      Do you mean…

      Hi Joyner, 

      Do you mean that you have a 21 days cycle? Kindly note that you can have a regular 21 days cycle and your fertile days are days 5,6, and 7 after the start of your monthly period. If you have an irregular period, it can be hard to plan for pregnancy as compared to those who have regular periods. However, there are some signs that can help you know whether you are ovulating. These include an increase in body temperature, higher desire for sex, breast tenderness, ovulation pain in yout lower abdomen, increase discharge, etc. Here are more tips on ovulation: All you need to know about ovulation. If you have more questions, don’t hesitate to ask. 

  43. Its a great lesson of…
    Its a great lesson of something I never knew.

    1. Hi Torres, 

      Glad you learnt…

      Hi Torres, 

      Glad you learnt something new!

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