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I am a guy, I enjoy anal sex, am I gay?

I am a man who enjoys anal sex and anal stimulation from my girlfriend, does that make me gay?

You’re reading this and my 6th sense tells me that you have rolled your eyes at that headline and introduction! You’ve probably arrived at a conclusion already! But this is a dilemma for many men.

First, gay sex often involves anal penetration but you know what else gay men do? They give each other blowjobs! They masturbate! So, if your girlfriend gives you blowjobs and you masturbate yourself, does that make you gay?

What I am trying to say is that the activities and body parts involved during sex cannot be used to determine whether someone is gay, bisexual, or not.

So, the fact that you enjoy anal sex or stimulation by your woman does not make you gay. Well, unless you secretly wish the dildo was another man’s penis!

If you love anal stimulation…

  • It could mean that you just think of it as exploring different avenues of pleasure.
  • It could mean you are a liberal who likes exploring your body.
  • It could mean that you are a man who likes to have his prostrates stimulated like many other men who are not necessarily gay. Let’s just say that the male G-spot is found in the anus and it feels great when stimulated even though many men will not admit this.

The prostrate contains a lot of nerve endings and this means that it is quite sensitive and feels oh-so-good when touched. Again, many straight men will not admit it but many enjoy prostate stimulation.

A man and a woman exploring sex together is heterosexual even if anal sex is involved. Everyone has an anus and they can choose to explore it however they wish without this defining their sexual orientation. Also, remember that there are men who have sex with other men but they are not gay. These men may be sex workers and their main objective is to make a living from sex work.

You’re not automatically gay if you:

  • Like anal sex
  • Like being pegged (a sexual practice where a woman penetrates a man’s anus with a dildo)
  • Have oral sex with another man
  • Like fingering your anus or practicing anal masturbation
  • Appreciate and compliment other men
  • Support gay rights; etc.

How do I know I am gay?

It’s simple:

  • Are you only romantically and/or sexually attracted to men? Yes? No?

If the answer to this question is yes, you are likely gay or bisexual.

Remember that this ‘attraction’ has nothing to do with sexual practices you enjoy, it’s all about attraction.

If it feels good, keep doing it!

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LoveMatters Africa

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