couple getting caught cheating
Jeppe Schilder

Cheating

Cheating means breaking the rules you have agreed on in a committed relationship. Usually cheating refers to sexual infidelity or adultery.

If you're making out or having sex with someone outside of your committed relationship, it means you’re cheating on your partner.
Cheating doesn’t always have to be sexual. Sometimes cheating is on an emotional level. When someone shares intimate thoughts with a person who’s not their partner, it’s called emotional cheating.

Cheating of any form can cause a lot of sorrow in relationships and can even lead to break-up or divorce. Find out more about cheating in our Cheating: top five facts.

Why do people cheat?

There are many reasons why people cheat on their partners. You might cheat if you don’t love your partner any more, if sex isn’t satisfying, if your partner has cheated on you in the past, or if you feel neglected or under-appreciated.

Lying to your partner about your affairs can be a stop-gap arrangement, but it’s very likely that sooner or later your partner will discover the truth. If you feel guilty about having cheated and don't want to end your relationship, confession might be an option. You could also keep quiet about what happened, although the lack of honesty could put a strain on your relationship.

If you've cheated and decide you want to end it with your partner, there are two options – to confess your behaviour and say goodbye, or to hide your infidelity and say you want to break up for other reasons.

Is your partner cheating on you?

If you know your partner well and have had a close, long-term relationship, you can often tell when something’s not right. You might notice that they’ve begun spending a lot more time at work, they have less time for you and your family, start taking calls in private, and seem less committed to doing things with you. Maybe they're paying attention to their looks, and they appear confused and detached. When you ask them if anything's wrong, they shrug off your question.

Finding out that your partner’s been cheating on you can be a traumatic experience. It can seriously damage the trust between the two of you and could even lead to a break-up, separation or divorce. You might spend days, weeks or months wondering what you did wrong and why this happened.

But don't blame yourself - take some time to calm down and think about your relationship.

Whether you want to stay with your partner depends on a number of things. Is your partner willing to go on? If they are, what will it take for them to regain your trust? Will your trust in them ever be restored? How can you start rebuilding your relationship? The answers may not be simple, but give these questions some thought and it might help you decide on the right path to take.

Comments
X (not verified)
Fri, 10/17/2014 - 07:02 am

What of a lady who jus enjoy cheating and do sleep with different men,is that relationship worth being into?Though she also enjoy sex with the boyfriend but stil has urge for other men.

Hi Roba,  there is no way to know for sure if someone is cheating on you. The best thing you can do is try to communicate with your partner. Be honest with them about your suspicions and your feelings along with your fears. I know this can be scary to bring it up but try to just tell them why you suspect something is wrong and not just accuse them a cheater. Generally if we hold on to our thoughts you might take things the wrong way believe something without knowing if it is real or not.
Gloria (not verified)
Sat, 10/25/2014 - 10:11 pm

Do you think a man who is sharing love words to every female whom he has her contact is cheating on his wife?
Nina (not verified)
Thu, 11/13/2014 - 07:11 am

Hi love matters my boyfriend of 4 years cheated on me n got another lady pregnant just after I had given birth to our dota now he's back in my life claiming he loves only me but the other chick calls him constantly n av started having doubts he tells me he has nothing to do with her but I feel there's something what do I do?

Hi Nina, take some time away from him and think about what you want. Do you think you will be able to trust him again? Do you think he will do it again? How is he going to deal with the other woman, and his other child? Think about all these things, and make your decision based on that. Good luck!
Kevin (not verified)
Tue, 11/25/2014 - 03:26 pm

She has password all over her phone... Messages... call log gallery... And she always put her phone inside her bag... Is she cheating or hiding something

Hi Kevin, privacy is a good thing. Even if she has nothing to hide, you shouldn't even consider going through her phone. Do you love her, and trust her? Yes- great. No- then you need to start working on that.
Dan (not verified)
Thu, 11/27/2014 - 02:26 pm

what u meet ur first girlfriend n she says tht she loves u n wante u to leave the girl u heard then after sometimes she is not active in ur communication n she claims tht she as been looking for u quit sometime n she is greatful she as got me now she want us to get married is this a true love

Hi Dan, communication is the most important part of any relationship, and it seems this needs some improvement in yours. Unless you both openly say what you feel, need and want, your relationship won't have a future.
ben (not verified)
Sun, 12/28/2014 - 09:21 pm

any tym we meet she tend to leave all dox shez wid includin men and acompaniz me to wereva am goin to buh wen i tel her dat i lav her,she telx me dat she had bin tryin to lav me buh she find it vry dificult to do xo.wat do u tnk ix di mata
Ann (not verified)
Mon, 01/12/2015 - 10:29 am

i hav been datin a man for a yr. we had alot of dixagreemnt and i dcidd 2 keep xylnt 4 xmetym. we could rearly meet afta a week a gal came claiming 2b pregnant wid hm, da parentx of da galx 4cd da gal 2 xtay wid ma boyfrnd i xtl luv hm n i fynd hard 2 move on da guy is sory n claim 2 xtl luv me wat xhud i du am confuxd
Innocent. (not verified)
Tue, 01/27/2015 - 04:09 am

pls is there a way for me to gt ova ma jealousy ova ma finance? i do trust her bt i always feel some kinda little jealousy wen eva shes with anoda guy.

That's totally okay to feel a bit of jealousy! It just shows how much you care and would hate to lose her. I'm sure she feels the same way when you talk to other girls. Talk to her. Tell her how you feel. Maybe you can come up with a way for you to feel less jealous.
jeff austine (not verified)
Sun, 02/01/2015 - 05:01 pm

hy..ma girlfriend ix suspecious,,jax rezently a read ha text cox a wax wd ha 4 lunch,,and arealizd her ex ix texting ha,,and she wrote that shex single and we togetha,,hw do atel that shex nt cheating by nw,,bt i hav nt askd ha wat do i do???
jeff austine (not verified)
Sun, 02/01/2015 - 05:03 pm

hy..ma girlfriend ix behaving wierd..jax rezently a read ha text wen i was wth ha 4 lunch,,and arealizd her & EX CHATING,,and she wrote that shex single and yet we togetha,,hw do atel that shex nt cheating by nw,,bt i hav nt askd ha wat do i do???

Jeff, first things first: reading someone else's texts is not good. It's an invasion of their privacy. What would you say if someone was reading yours? Next, have you talked to her? Have you asked her if she is cheating? Don't be accusing, ask her in a quiet moment, and see what she says.
James (not verified)
Fri, 03/13/2015 - 04:54 pm

hi! I have I have a girlfriend av been dating for one year now. She loves me and I too love her. She recently went back to school for better a grade and this means I'll miss her for quite long. When she calls me, she says she is doubting if I cant cheat on her. I had assured her of my love but she can't be free in mind. I suspect these negative feelings may eventually loose her interest in me. Advice me please

James, long distance relationships are hard, and they require a lot of hard work from both partners. Good communication is one thing. Start by asking her what she needs from you to feel safe that you are not cheating, Good luck!
shannice (not verified)
Sun, 03/29/2015 - 10:18 am

hi,have been dating a guy for quite sometime,i payed a visit and what i saw was pairs of shoes and some clothes which belonged to a lady,i assumed and on the next visit i found more shoes and clothes...i asked a friend whom they stay together and he told me that the guy that i was dating had another chic...i payed a visit yesterday and i found him with a chic..the same chic who had been told about,the owner of the shoes and clothes,pliz advise me on what to do...

Shannice, the guy is cheating on you! It's up to you to decide now what you want to do- do you want to stay with this guy who isn't honest with you and can't even be bothered to hide is other girlfriend's stuff when you are around, or do you want to be with a guy and be the only woman in his life? Regardless of what you decide, you should talk to him and see what he has to say for himself.
moz (not verified)
Tue, 04/21/2015 - 08:25 am

I hv ag.f shi s stl studying while am working I normally cal ha to request to meet wid mh shi insist dat shi insisted she s fearing ha parent am confused I fl cheated wad shl I do
alfred (not verified)
Sun, 05/03/2015 - 04:50 pm

hi was in relationship bt it never worked becoz the lady never respected me and she used to insult me and finally she threatened to kill me with a knife ,thn I decided to leave her ..now am in love with another lady ,and we had a child with that lady.can I tell her everything coz she want to knw about my past...do I tell her everything or I Wait for our relationship to grow thn I confess later?

Alfred, good for you that you left! Whether you tell her now or not it up to you. Do you feel the time is right? If you do, go ahead. If you think it would be better to wait a little longer, wait. You will find the right time!
chary (not verified)
Tue, 05/12/2015 - 09:55 am

my bf want to marry me so that i can take kea of his brother n i dnt want to coz am not well stable . help pliz
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